My dove in the clefts of the rock,
In the hiding places on the mountainside,
Show me your face,
Let me hear your voice;
For your voice is sweet, and your face lovely.
Song of Solomon 2:14
This is the image God gave me when I was at Connect Week of AIM, April 2013. Each candidate stood to give their testimony of how God had brought them to seek to continue their journey with the Lord in Africa. This was the week that I was reminded where Namibia was and was introduced to the San people for the first time. Now three years later, I sit here in Tsumkwe, Namibia with the San as my neighbors.
This image returned to me this past week in some very difficult meetings. All of us have had difficult times whether in our childhood, our marriage, our workplace, our family, our walk with the Lord. We don’t understand why these things happen. We want answers. Why did this have to happen? Why me?
For me I hid from the difficulties of life for a very long time. I was so shy. I was this dove in the clefts of the rock, in the hiding places on the mountainside. But God called me out in my senior year of high school. He called me to stop running from Him and He wanted me to make a difference for Him. This just started the journey I have been on for the past 20 years.
At Connect Week, I shared that I was that dove in clefts that God had called. I was sitting on His finger and He was telling me to fly. This meant fly to Africa to follow Him. I never would have imagined this first year in Africa was going to be so hard and difficult. There have been several times I have wanted to just quit and go home. I have experience great homesickness the past 3 months. (Please forgive me for not blogging during this time, but I am back.) One of my favorite verses is Isaiah 40:31 “but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” Most of the time I focus on the hope, the not growing weary, and the not fainting. AIM really wants their missionaries to thrive in Africa. They want us to soar like eagles. The Lord wants us to soar like eagles. But it’s hard to find that hope sometimes.
Many people shy away from Song of Solomon because of the detailed love between God and His beloved. This is the intimate love God desires to have with each one of us. The first verse asks God to kiss His beloved “for your love is more delightful than wine.” I am so thankful God’s love for me did not leave me that shy dove in the clefts and He desires to see my face and hear my voice. As I grow in my faith here in Africa, I search for my voice in the Lord even when it is the most difficult thing to do. I search for my voice in a language I do not know yet. I search for a voice.
So why do things happen? Why do things have to be so difficult?
I have just started reading a book which says “the Lord heals by leaving the broken part right there in place, overcoming it by His nature. Our trust as Christians can only be in His righteousness in us and for us – always! Thus the world is turned upside down! The world would fix the broken thing and rebuild personal pride and confidence. The Lord says, “We’ll fix it by not mending it at all! We’ll use that broken thing to give glory to God, and from that awareness of sin we will build trust every day anew in God’s Holy Spirit to sing the beauty of Christ’s nature through us for all to see.”” From chapter one of Transforming the Inner Man: God’s powerful principals for inner healing and lasting life change by John L Sandford
So why do things happen? We live in a broken world full of sin. Are you aware of your own sin?
Why are things so difficult? Maybe we are trying to fix it and not allowing God to use the broken thing to bring Him glory.
God can make a dove soar like an eagle.
He can give a voice to sing the beauty of Christ.
Will you trust Him to use that broken thing in your life to give Him glory?